marry rich!!! that’s the one facet of mate-finding that I’ve noticed people DON’T settle on. strange no? it must mean something. education, they settle. background (meaning family status), they settle. height, they settle. weight, they settle (in terms of the guy only however). geographic location, they settle. age, they often settle. but $$$…no one settles. they DO pick guys who lack potential and initiative and intelligence…but only if their family is well off and can provide a comfortable lifestyle.
so i can see how and why this whole idea of a the woman being the bread-winner can be a touchy issue. it can be emasculating. [in response to:http://finance.yahoo.com/family-home/article/102459/When_She_Makes_More_Money_Than_He ]
i appreciate education…the idea of a graduate education. sometimes it’s not necessary. some of the best businessmen in the world have gone on to be highly creative/successful WITHOUT education. but they have experience. they’ve gone beyond their comfort zones to make something of themselves. for people in our social network, a graduate education has caused them to go out of their comfort zones. to sacrifice parties, trips, etc. to get good grades, study hard…graduate. it’s all relative.
but at this point, i still value a man’s resume qualities b/c i think they are representative of “below the surface” qualities that we can’t quite quantify or articulate. i’m a lawyer…big f*cking wow. i doubt i have a typical lawyer personality and i probably lack much of the discipline people assume i have/had for becoming an atty 6 years out of high school. yet…i admit i’m determined, i enjoy deep/analytical thought and conversations…i enjoy the company of intelligent people.
so…i guess at the end of the day…i wanna be with a guy who is smart AND successful. i prefer independent success as opposed to inherited $ucce$$. but all i ask is for a guy with potential. at the same time, he must be someone who can discuss worldly topics with understanding and reason.
am i the last girl on earth who still values personality and intelligence more so than the house and a guy’s parents’ income??? i guess what i’m saying is, at this point, i still wouldn’t pick a guy who can simply provide financial security but fails to provide intellectual stimulation. oh yeah, he has to be FUN too. i’m not saying obnoxious “haha” annoying sense of humor fun…i mean silly fun. someone to appreciate the dumb things that make me giggle from time to time. he can’t be COLD.
bottom line, financial security is important. it’s something i’ve grown up without more so than with. but, the emotional connection and “below the surface” stuff as opposed to superficial aspects of the house, car, credit cards qualities that i’ve experienced and endured, in light of the lack of financial security, strike me as being far more valuable.
sooo…i wanna be with someone like me. he doesn’t have to come from money. he doesn’t have to be drowning in it now (or ever). but i want to see that he’s done some of the things i have…like made it through school and still wants to have the white picket fence…a couple of babies…a cool car…a vacation here and there. be involved in the armenian community. support the church and the schools. blah blah blah…
he has to know about stuff going on in the world. discuss them with me from time to time…(intelligently, NOT ignorantly)…care about me, my family…enjoy the company of my friends (i am more than willing to offer him the same comfort and respect)…go nice places…go dumb places…cuddle up on the couch and watch a tv show with me from time to time. and if i make more money than he does at certain points in our lives…it’s all good. i’ll look past it. and i hope he won’t notice.
but seeing as all this is sooooo HARD to come by…i still say…marry rich. it seems that comfort is worth it. i hope not to compromise my ideals in terms of a good man who makes me happy/content/satisfied…but if at some point i realize that type of man is not knockin’ on my door…i’ll take the guy who can provide the mercedes and the louis vuitton…at least i’ll be well accessorized when i’m out with my girls (who i’ll be left no choice but to seek out for the convos and chats).